Introduction
After living in the West for 7 years now, I could not help but observe how the dating values are upside down from what I believe dating and how humans relationships should be.
Let me quickly explain how things run in the Western world: Two people meet, they go have sex on the first, second date, or third date then later (and perhaps) go through the efforts to really know about each other or just dump each other and start looking for a new sexual adventure all over again.
It seems it is a recurrent pattern where people these days rarely go through the trouble to know each other on a level deeper then the carnal and physical dimension. Instead, they first jump directly into the sexual phase with random strangers after a few drinks or just because they could not contain their animal instinct.
I could be generalizing, but perhaps not. Look around you, look at the movies, look at ads, look at the current fashion and how people live in an age of “sexual liberation” and are driven by self gratifications and short-term satisfaction while contracting STDs left and right and producing unwanted babies (let’s not talk about the cruelty of abortion resulting from such a lifestyle) that become a burden on society because no one cared for them properly.
In gross, this is the Western lifestyle. Unfortunately, this lifestyle is slowly infiltrating the rest of the world as well.
Anyway, this is a huge topic and perhaps in the future I will delve into this matter in details, but for now, I want to share with you how I see a man and a woman relate in respect to their spiritual make up and physiology.
Let’s get started.
What are chakras?
Okay, some background information in case you never heard of the word “chakra”. In Sanskrit, the word “chakra” means wheel or an energy point (something similar to Chinese acupuncture points). The human body have lots of energy centers but the seven major chakras are usually spoken of.
Here are their various attributes and colors:
- Root Chakra: located at the base of the spine and is colored red. It is mainly the force behind our survival instinct, stability and being grounded.
- Sacral or the Sex Chakra: located at the lower abdomen a few inches below the navel. It has the orange color. It is mainly associated with the sexual organs (sexuality), creativity and reproduction.
- Solar plexus chakra: located at the upper abdomen, below the breast bone. It has the yellow color. Its main characteristics are: self-confidence, self-esteem and personal power.
- Heart chakra: located in the center of the chest at the physical heart height. Its color is green. Its main characteristics are: loving others and oneself, kindness, inner peace and joy.
- Throat chakra: located at the throat area. It has the color blue. It represents our ability to talk and communicate, expressing oneself, creativity, speaking wisdom and truth.
- Third eye chakra: located above the eyebrows, between the eyes. It has the indigo color. This chakra is also known as the sixth sense. It is associated with the pituitary gland, its main characteristics include: wisdom, vision (clairvoyance), intuition and imagination.
- Crown chakra: located just above the top of the head. It has the white or violet color. It represents our ability to be connected spiritually to the life force and to the divine. It also represents our inner beauty.
What do these seven chakras have to do with dating you would say? I will explain that in the next sections.
Now that you know the basics of chakras, let’s get started.
Modern dating – The upside down world
Now let’s revisit the modern dating and look upon it from the chakras and their functions’ point of view.
Two people meet in a bar, nightclub, party or what not. They are attracted by their instincts (Chakra 1 – Root chakra).
Usually, after intoxication, their inhibition lowers and their animal instinct / sexual instinct is aroused. They proceed with the sexual act (Chakra 2 – Sex chakra).
They perhaps go for another date, but usually things don’t work out: lack of confidence, low self-esteem from either side of the relationship (Chakra 3 – Solar plexus).
Love and kindness between the two rarely gets a chance to blossom (Chakra 4 – Heart chakra).
They don’t communicate properly together, they fight, shout or speak foul things (Chakra 5 – Throat chakra).
They lack intuition and they don’t connect spiritually. There are not in tune with each other (Chakra 6 – Third eye chakra). They don’t have a strong connection to the divine (Chakra 7 – Crown chakra), so they barely hold on to the relationship and they start over again and again with this vicious circle with other partners.
In this mode of operation, they are going against their spiritual nature, harming themselves in the long run and contributing nothing but trouble to the society.
The seven stages of spiritual dating
Now let’s talk about how dating can be approached from a more spiritual aspect.
Two people are genuinely looking for a relationship. They work on their character, are humble and kind. They are connected to the divine (Chakra 7 – Crown chakra). Because of that and through divine bliss, their paths cross: they meet.
They feel in tune with each other and can easily connect spiritually through intuition. It is as if they are telepathic and can read each other’s minds. These couple click (Chakra 6 – The third eye).
They continue their relationship and nurture it with kind words, words of wisdom and truth (Chakra 5 – Throat chakra).
They are more and more connected, finding their spiritual connection ever growing. Love starts to blossom in the heart (Chakra 4 – Heart chakra). Their love is based on good foundations (divinity, intuition, creativity and truth).
With their love, their confidence in each other grow and makes their relationship more and more strong, more and more stable. They become more self-confident, empowered and they compliment each other (Chakra 3 – Solar plexus). Disrespect have no room in their relationship.
They not only love each other, speak truth, trust each other but now start to develop stronger (sexual) feelings. They are in a serious relationship. The fruit of their spiritual discipline is expressed with the act of sexual intercourse. Two become one. The man knows the woman. Procreation might entail, and children may be born (Chakra 2 – Sex chakra).
Having gone through all the previous six divine stages and expressed themselves spiritually and physically, their relationship does not end there. Now they have a child or family. Their main focus is survival and the proper nurturing of their offsprings. They are no longer focused on carnal and sexual activity alone. They seek stability that is essential for a grounded and practical way of living.
They share their life responsibly and contribute well in the society.
Conclusion
Viola, I just shared with you my vision and thoughts on how a proper way of dating, relating and mating in a solid manner that is in line with our spiritual make up.
I hope you enjoyed reading this article and got inspired by it. Please let me know your thoughts.
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beautiful and well-written. insightful and relatable.
When it came time for that talk my Dad said, in way of warning, that some girls will just as soon take off their clothes for me as not. He didn’t say where these delightful people could be found.
Your vision expresses two extremes. And the spiritual dating description should more properly be described as soul dating. While the spirit is perfect the soul is not; for that matter, the enlightened ones may not even date, feeling complete in their perfection. A soul seeks that perfection each in its own way, including with relationships, guided for good or ill by nature, by teachings of family & society, and so on. And the world is developing a huge middle class, a.k.a., leisure class; the social guidance of religions which tend to support procreation & families is encroached upon by consumerism. Growing economic and social freedom, especially the emancipation of women as well as available birth control, is something new, inviting excesses that once only aristocrats could indulge.
The vision also contains a promise that, living properly, we will surely meet and pair with a soulmate. That belief can lead to desperation, self-doubt, and despair as one ages. Divine bliss will have other intentions for many – does that mean they can never benefit from the occasional kiss?
I think one can love himself better by remembering that our imperfect souls are trying to return to the perfection from which we come, each according to our own understanding, our own vision – somewhere between the extremes. Likewise, as the crown chakra is our connection with the All, it seems the least likely to feel a hunger, to be on the hunt; most of us are working our way up, a bit blindly.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts on so many things.